Let me tell you! There are moments when being single really, really sucks! When all of your friends are married. Don't get it twisted, I'm not hating by any means. I am happy for each and every one of them. The issue is, and call me selfish if you wanna, they are no longer available to be my friend. I get the whole marriage thing, please believe me, I understand, but we can no longer be the friends we use to be when you've now married who you deem to be your new BFF.
In the word, Paul talks about the difference between a virgin and a married woman. A virgin has more time to devote to kingdom work. A married woman cares more for the world and how to please her husband. How does that relate to friendship? A single friend has more time to hang out and talk. When you need them, they are more available. A married friend, now has a family and a spouse to devote their time to. Have you ever had that friend that calls you but can't talk because they are talking to everyone else in the background? Or you text them and tell them specifically to call you when they have time. That means when you have time to listen to me, give me a call. Yet, they call you in between doing things and are constantly telling you to hold on or that they will call you back every 5 seconds. Or when they call you, that thing you wanted to share with them isn't relevant because whatever is going on with them becomes the topic of conversation.
Once again, no hate intended. My friends at this point in my life are ministers. so when I call, its because I had a revelation I want to share, because I have a question, or I want to bounce an idea off of someone before I finalize a message. I don't really have life things going on. The Lord has me in such a place that the world almost doesn't exist outside of work and home and I'm ok with that, but when something does happen, I want to be able to share it or call and say hey pray for me. Here lately, that has not been the case. Have you ever felt like your friendship makes you the mistress, lol? Like they can only talk to you when the spouse isn't around in order to be able to have a real conversation, and even that has diminished quite a bit. Now of course, we know things change when people get married. It's not hate, it's just time to find new, single friends. Not just any friends though. I need friends whose lives are rooted in the Lord. I don't want to have meaningless conversations about nothing. I don't want to hear about your baby daddy/mama drama. I don't want to hear about your social media beef...I am so past that.
I have realized again, that I am at another point in my life where the Lord is purging me. I realize that this about to be another season in my life where things fall off. This is a season in my life where He needs me to depend solely on Him. In order to do what it is He wants me to do, I have to be isolated so I can hear directly from Him. He wants me to talk to Him about everything. He wants all of the things we think are too trivial to Him, He wants every aspect of our lives. Being alone in my singleness has an entirely different meaning for me. Does it get lonely, do I feel lonely? Sometimes and not at all. When I spend time with Him and do what it is He wants me to do, there is no room for loneliness and I'm not alone.
Yes, He put in us the desire to be with someone else, but we have to have a relationship with Him first. Just like children, we build a relationship with our parents as we grow. We learn from them and spend most of our lives with them. Once we are old enough or are mature enough, then we can go out into the world and utilize those things that we learned; good or bad. Our Father, the Creator is no different. If we go to Him as children, He can teach us all the stuff we didn't learn as children or He breaks down the wrong things we learned and then replaces it with all the right stuff. IF! If you make time to spend with Him. In order to meet my Adam, I have to stop talking to someone else's. Whew!
No comments:
Post a Comment