In writing this book, I had to confront my past. I've never been ashamed of it. I always knew that everything happened for a reason, I just didn't know to what end. I didn't like all of it, some of it lead me down dark paths, but the Lord always called me back. People always told me that I was stronger than I thought. That someone else who had gone through what I'd been through would not have survived it. That was evident in the many people I'd met who had completely gone to one extreme or another as a result of some trauma or hurt. And for some reason they were always attracted to me. I could not figure out for the life of me, why all of my friends, in my opinion, were bat-crap crazy! I kept asking the Lord why I kept encountering these people.
It wasn't until I had children of my own that it started to make sense. My daughter had friends that had major issues. They were always at my house and always wanted to talk to me. WTW!!! Lord, will I ever get away from people who can't handle their own lives? I know, that sounds really harsh, but years of not having really close friends made me cynical and unable to be sensitive to others issues. I didn't have anyone that I could rely on like that, no one to dump all my issues on. So why do they keep coming to me? My issue with not wanting to deal with other peoples issues kept me from realizing my purpose in the kingdom, when dealing with other peoples issues is part of my purpose. I talked to them and told them what they needed to hear. I tried to help them as best I could. Of course, teenagers will always do what feels good to them. My own children didn't and don't listen to me. It's not until something happens and they realize the truth in what I had told them previously, that they get it. Sometimes people will only get it when something happens. My main goal in raising my children was to train them up in the way they should go and to keep them from making unnecessary mistakes through my own experiences.
Not just with my children and their friends, but with people I encountered on the job as well. I didn't realize the scope of my influence on the job, lol. I was a hot mess, but in all the people I encountered, didn't try to make them a hot mess too. I wanted everyone else to be better. Well, let's tell the truth, most of us use to be a hot mess. Some of the people I encountered were a hotter mess than me. I tried to influence them to be better. My hot-messed-ness was on a whole different level. Most women I encountered were in toxic relationships and wouldn't let go, I refused to be in a relationship at all, lol. My claim to fame was never settle down, never let em see you sweat, don't stick around long enough for them to catch feelings, lol. Hey! I'm not anything if I'm not honest!
So imagine my surprise when it all started coming together. When the frozen layers of my heart began to melt and I actually wanted to help the youth. I mean, it's bad enough that we don't learn the truth about religion and God until we're adults, but it's even worse that the youth of this generation aren't even learning the little that we learned as youth. Grandmothers are so much younger these days and are still out clubbing and kickin it to truly be grandmothers. Instead of teaching the babies, they are drinking and smoking with them. No one attends church because they have witnessed so much death and destruction, hardly anyone believes there is a God anymore.
I have seen the same traumas I endured as a child in a lot of these young girls today. They don't have to say a word, their behavior speaks for itself. I want so badly to tell them that this is not who they are meant to be. That there is Man that loves them unconditionally and will never hurt them or leave them as many of their fathers or male relatives have. Of course you have to gain their trust first, though. These children trust no one. They feel like everyone is against them and no one knows what they've been through. Trust me, been there, done that, bought a t-shirt. They have no clue how many people are out there that truly understand and want to help, because no one wants to confront their pasts. No one wants to admit or share the horrors of their youth to help this generation survive.
Then you have parents that get angry when you try to help their child. They have no intentions on doing it, but don't want you to do it either. What ever happened to it takes a village? You can't say two words to someone's child without them wanting to come and fight you like we're still in high school and when their child starts getting into trouble it's either a major shock or it's like they knew it would happen eventually. WTW!!! We have to do better by our youth. This generation will not be the future if we don't help them survive the present. That means, swallowing our pride and sharing the wisdom we gained from our elders or even trial and error. However you obtained it, it must be shared. Give this generation hope for a future.
I heard someone say that this generation is just lost, that there is no hope for them. I refuse to believe that. The way the world is right now, we have to band together so that this generation can make it better. That starts with a firm foundation. It may not come from home, it may have to be you. Our teachers have lost hope in our youth, they are unwilling to continue to try. It's become too much dealing with these unruly children and their ghetto parents. The system has broken down and failed our teachers who were the second line of defense for these kids. So now where do they go? What do they do?
What will you do? Can you admit to being broken, relive your past by telling your story to empower someone else? Can you imagine the blessing that will flow when you embrace your past to help someone else? No one ever said it would be easy. Life was not and is not easy for most of, but it can be better......for you and the lives you touch.
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